Hump the pole, man

These few days, we've been encountering several senile old/young people, or they're just plain huffy about life.

I still remember an incident at East Coast Park during primary 6, some old man came charging after us on a bike and shit started spewing out of his mouth:

Old Dude: They fired me because of my mole, you know. See, it's very big. They fired me for that. Never trust them. Never, don't get big moles.

At Bugis, we sat down in the seats next to these old women, who immediately brashed out, pointing her finger at us:

Old Dudette: *mysterious hokkien/cantonese/malay/turkish/chinese language rings out*

She eyes were practically popping out of her sockets as she spoke, completely dismayed that we were sitting next to her.

I wanted to offer her a cup of shut-the-hell-up, but we were so stunned that our own eyes were practically popping out as well.

Then 2 seconds later, she chilled.
Was she senile? Or just simply has a freakish phobia of kids?

Afterwards, up in the cinema, this old man carrying a flyer followed us about.
He was shielding his nose and mouth in fear, with the flyer.

Everywhere we ran, he followed. I was nearly fainting in shock that he might be some paedophile on the loose.
Hump the pole man, hump the pole.

Eventually he lost interest, but it still freaked the shit out of us anyway.

And then there are the usual senile people.

Outside the cinema, where we were playing cards, a group of giggling girls came running along, talking in chinese which I didn't understand.

Yabber yabber yabber, then they whipped out a camera and started taking pictures of themselves outside the cinema, giggling along the way.

Evonne and Aiyan were scoffing and giving them incredulous looks all the way, but they wouldn't get the hint.

OOOO WOW, THE CINEMA! LIKE, OMGTOTALLYCOOOOOL.

I'm rather pleased to say that none of my friends have ever been the simultaneous-laughing sort, it would just look plain senile in public.
Okay, we do a little crazy laughter ourselves, but yeah.

Then today, outside the tution center, Eunice and I were sitting on the side of the steps talking.

Then suddenly we felt a poke in our shoulders and a naggy, "Excuse me arh!" rang.

The old lady simply squeezed in between us and carried her fat ass down the steps.
There was plenty of space for her to walk, about 3 metres in width, the stairs were.

But nooo, smack your ass between us man, you're welcomed.

I also saw an old man in the bus, shaking and nodding his head into space. He was murmuring things like, "No, No.. Cannot. No."

I was so afraid that he might suddenly jump up, smack my face with his plastic bag and go all "ooga shaga".

But he didn't, thank god.

Anyway, my point is, what ever happened to the holy image of oldies giving us cute little sweets, sharing with us their wise stories and letting kids sit on their laps?

I wonder if we'll end up like that, huffy and grumpy at kids, poking them with umbrellas, when we're 85 years old.

We're not gonna be loved by our grandchildren or even children when they grow up, because we're all gonna end up being grumpy and frumpy, being mean to our kids.

That's probably why we'll get stuffed in old folks homes, because we don't provide any source of entertainment, excitement, pleasant-ness, nice smell or anything rainbow or unicorn-ish for that matter.

And we're gonna squat around in singlets, picking our toenails, scracthing our itching asses and having loud, rude and hokkien conversations with fellow mahjong mates.

Yay.

We're not gonna lead a healthy, nice life which you see on those bank commercials where all the old folks look jolly, nono.

We're gonna rot in our wheelchairs in an old folks' home, with our spouse dead, peeing in your diaper and incompetent of chewing your own food.

We'll die with uncontrollable bladders, alone.

Anyway, due to C.Y's complaint about my bitching about bimbo gang, I apologise.

I suppose they DO have a good side to them, they all do, even Whiny Bitch and Shithead.

And since it's already our last year, I might as well be optimistic about everyone, even though it kills me to do so.

In fact, one wise friend gave a very unique and different perspective about Shithead:

"Even though he keeps failing (in getting girlfriends), it's admirable that he keeps on trying."

Or something like that anyway.

Right, that statement actually gave me a whole new insight, really.
It completely changed my view about Shithead.

Usually whenever he does that, we just say he's being a flirt. But maybe he's just genuinely trying.

Sure, Shithead's pretty shitty, but I don't know, maybe he still has a good side.

In fact, I don't mind being friends with him again, after all of that shit that happened. I just don't like the hair, dude.

In fact, Shithead and I used to be good friends. Too bad he had to screw everything up, but still, it was a friendship.

And Whiny Bitch. Well. Errr... I can't really think about anything good to say about her, but I'm sure there is a glimmer of hope somewhere.

Maybe she can be a real friend to you if you're her best friend.

Now let's see, and bimbo gang.

Okay, the reason I don't like them is because I know they're all backstabbing in their hearts, they're like.. the Stepford Wives.
They're all perfect and something's wrong.

The good thing about them is that they're alright to get along with, you can talk to them. Just.. don't get close to them.

And I love everyone else in 2C, yay. Ew I sound like an emo kiddo who loves the world, but whatever.

So.. that's it man. As Evonne says, "LURFE YA!"